No Dakota Fan

Have South Dakotans lost their fucking minds?

They're banning all abortion, even in cases of rape and incest (which is the same thing).

That's great news for rapists! Now they can have their children mothered by any women they want!

Let me make this outrageous, unconfirmable statement: It would appear to me that the South Dakotan Republican Senators support the parental rights of rapists.

I know, I know...those pricks in the SD Senate don't hate women -- they love babies more.

Of course, they're full of shit. They don't like babies either, especially Native American ones. Anyone remember Wounded Knee?

And so on and so on...

Will your state be next?

P.S. - You know what Jesus says about abortion? Absolutely nothing. So please keep him out of the discussion, all you anti-choice kooks!

The Low Low Moon

36 and 1/2 years later, here I am, semi-nude, finishing off a bottle of Merlot and listening to a Vic Chesnutt album. Indeed, this is greatness in one of her many forms. The wine is of Washington vintage. The album is "Is the Actor Happy", the 2004 reissue on New West Records (originally released in 1995 on Texas Hotel).

I am anticipating the release of the first full-length by Heirs to the McQueen Fortune, the group formed by my brothers and me. We're now in post-production for the album "The Low Low Moon", produced by the pius brothers, and recorded at Little Ease Studios, Portland, OR, aka the Feeb's basment, save for one track recorded at The Castle on the Oregon Coast. The album's been two years in the making, and has gone through both title changes, and group changes (would it be a Pizazz, Feebs, or Heirs album?). We decided, rightly on the Heirs.

Heirs to the McQueen Fortune are Jim, Pete and myself. Sounding a lot like a Feebs meets the Throats album, with the underrated talent of Pete to lift the music a notch higher. The three of us have recorded together once before as The Sleeping Brothers, an album quickly conceived and executed (or vice versa) in '96 or '97 in Calabash, NC. It's an odd little album that serves as fitting prequel to the present masterwork we've crafted of late.

I'm looking at an April release date, once we remix the songs and get the album cover done. It will primarily be available through CDBaby.com and soonafter on iTunes and many other digital download sites.

For the few of you who have heard Jim's and my music, this is our best work ever. A bold statement, depending on your tastes.

Too old for MTV, and too unpolished (and balls-to-the-fucking-wall) for Adult Contemporary, we are doomed to obscurity for the next 25 years until we're discovered.

Your grandkids are gonna love us.

Sonsabitches...Bumpuses!

Darren McGavin has died at the age of 83. With many roles to his credit, I will always cherish as the father in "A Christmas Story." Not a Christmastime (or any other occasion) goes by that my family doesn't quote his character in what has become one of the greatest holiday films ever.

"He looks like a pink nightmare."

"You used all the glue on purpose."

"He's...smiling."

"Fragile...Must be Italian!"

Farewell, Kolchak! Your stalking nights are over!

And Don Knotts is gone as well! I've gotta put "No Deposit, No Return" in my Netflix queue!

If These Things Anger You

Be Angry at the Sun
by
Robinson Jeffers

That public men publish falsehoods
Is nothing new. That America must accept
Like the historical republics corruption and empire
Has been known for years.

Be angry at the sun for setting
If these things anger you. Watch the wheel slope and
turn,
They are all bound on the wheel, these people, those
warriors,
This republic, Europe, Asia.

Observe them gesticulating,
Observe them going down. The gang serves lies, the
passionate
Man plays his part; the cold passion for truth
Hunts in no pack.

You are not Catullus, you know,
To lampoon these crude sketches of Caesar. You are far
From Dante's feet, but even farther from his dirty
Political hatreds.

Let boys want pleasure, and men
Struggle for power, and women perhaps for fame,
And the servile to serve a Leader and the dupes to be
duped.
Yours is not theirs.

(1941)

Desperadoes Under the Eaves

Don't the sun look angry through the trees
Don't the trees look like crucified thieves
Don't you feel like desperados under the eaves
Heaven help the one who leaves
- Warren Zevon

I don't think there's ever been written a more beautiful chorus.

Where Doth Soft Rock End and Lite Rock Begin?

WFMU offers this insightful guide.

Kara-Okies!

Shee-it! They sing a lot of country songs at karaoke out here! Almost more than in the Carolinas. But I forget -- it's cowboy country four steps out of Portland.

I got off 5 songs last night at The Ambassador, a Chinese Restaurant/Karaoke Bar that just remodeled its exterior to resemble a castle. Actually, after a little bit of research, I realize it looks a lot like Jiayuguan Fortress, also known as the "Strongest Fortress Under Heaven."

I wonder if Jiayuguan Fortress was also notorious for serving the "Weakest Bourbon and Coke Under Heaven"? Ah, what does it matter? The Crab Puffs are exquisite!

My repertoire was thus (followed by its rating):
1. Born to Run - Questionable
2. Come Dancing - Fumbling
3. The Stranger - Spot on (although with the whistling, I kept blowing in the mic)
4. Walk Away Renee - Nailed it!
5. Brandy - Got them on the dance floor!

Overall, a 60%. 70% if you consider I had to hold the mic in my hand. I believe the mic stand should be standard at all karaoke bars. And a stool. What am I? Tom "Fucking" Jones? (Thank god no one sang any Tom "Fucking" Jones for a change. Although, "I Will Survive" reared its ugly head around 11ish.)

I got home around 1:30 to find that, alas, the empty sidewalks on my block were still the same...